An Adventurous Weekend...

I've realized that food issues are something that is completely private--it's not something that one shares with the world.  Why, then, have a blog? Because sometimes even your most private thoughts need to leak out into the world.  They need to be shared.

This weekend, I found myself staring down a bottle of pills. I freaked myself out, and I freaked my girlfriend out, and I freaked out a few friends, too.  I swear, it's the not eating that gets me to this point. But can I stop? No. I'm so determined to lose those damn 15 lbs that I can't stop, even if it means my death. That's stupid--completely stupid.  But I can't stop. I'm sunk.

In other news, I've realized that I've gone far too long without being intellectually stimulated.  Thank the Lord, I'm taking classes again. It's opened my eyes to what I need from the world. I need intellect. I need to study something to be happy. I need music in my life. I need to be so immersed in something that I can't separate myself from it.

I need to eat normally...